HUGE BABY SALE

That’s right folks, I’m selling a huge baby! Just one. The baby is related to fuccillo.

Listen lady, I’m advertising all over town about my ginormous baby sale next week. Come on out, there will be circus performers and lion wranglers. And by this I totally mean I’ll be the fool dancing around while I tame Rory from running rampant into the street or taking a bite out of any guest.

This weekend I started sorting through baby clothes that I’ve been saving, like newborn baby clothes. I pulled out the newborn onesies and, holy batman those things are tiny. For a second I got a twinge of desire to have another little cuddly frog baby to hold.

You forget just how tiny a newborn is until you compare to Rory the tank…just as he whips a little people pig at your head and beats you with his plastic hammer. Rest assured folks, my tiny twinge went away really fast.

Cardin is finding it hard to part with many of her old outfits and spent a good part of the weekend squeezing her non-existent butt into pants that were clearly too tight and then rested mid calf. She went out to the store and a family party, dressed to the nines, in sporting some older clothes that clearly didn’t fit. Sometimes I feel like I should put a note on her that reads, “I didn’t dress her today” and then other times I feel like it’s pretty self explanatory.